Before moving to the city for an intense two month internship the only knowledge I had of London office speak stemmed from prescriptive columnists and Grumpy Old, I never imagine any of the jargon they moaned about was actually used. That was until my first day when the MD (any term that bemuses me) threw “just ringing to touch base” into every phone conversation. I was genuinely surprised as I thought this was the kind of language used by office juniors on trains to impress their fellow passengers.
What’s more worrying than these meaningless phrases coming into everyday use is how infectious they are, when you’re confined to an office for six hours a day it’s difficult to avoid saying “I’ll ping you an email”. I’m not even sure I fully know what pinging is but I’ve done a hell of a lot of it in my two months in the job.
The whole reliance on email itself was another shock to a newcomer in the office place. On my first day I was sat twiddling my thumbs waiting for someone to give me a job, as all good interns do, when I received an email from the senior girl across the desk from me. Excited by the prospect of getting work email I eagerly opened it, as she was sat across desk from me I figured it must be some secret banter about the boss that couldn’t be spoken out loud. It read: “let me know when you are free as I have a job for you”. Firstly, I clearly was not busy as I was Googling my name for a laugh and secondly, what had happened to her vocal chords? I wasn’t sure on the correct etiquette for responding to this, did I email back saying simply “I’m free” or go for the traditional option of engaging my speech organs.
One advantage is you avoid such conversations like when am I getting paid? Or I’m leaving two hours early tomorrow but also means a lot of office-banter goes begging. Anyway, time to click up a new window to keep my computer looking busy. Good to touch base with you all, just ping me an email if you’ve any comments.
